Featured Image of the Day (November 17, 2019)

Starting at this point, we will run our own featured images. These comprise some quotes that will help us as we love and live.

To start, here’s our another quote, culled from a Love Advice:

(G)I-DLE ((여자)아이들) – Lion: MV Review

At this point, I am considering limiting MV Reviews for December releases. This is to focus on misheard lyrics, and year-end write-ups on K-Pop.


We are now up with a special release of (G)I-DLE in their song Lion. For a bit of info, this is a soft comeback that was given a music video. To add, the song was their final piece in Queendom.

We will touch on the group as it has proper MV, and since this serves as their memorabilia of engagements with the show. Being a new Neverland, how will the author rate the group? Let’s see:

(Side Note: At this point, I am also stanning (G)I-DLE, with Soojin as my ultimate bias, and Soyeon to be my bias wrecker.)

Storyline

The storyline best speaks of the girls performing as lions, with such attributes. For instance, Soyeon got wild inside jail, Soojin shows her claw marks at the back, and Miyeon showing her claws.

Being the king of the jungle, the lion takes the lead by showing its being wild and fierce, something the group wants to tell us. Soyeon mostly exemplifies this by posing wild in an iron jail.

Review as whole

The final moment defined the group as queens in full regalia. To add, they all wear crowns starting from Minnie.

(G)I-DLE is maturing at this point. The buildup can be heard abruptly starting at the first verse. Soyeon’s lines were progressive, but short to garner attention. While the final chorus would seem to end abruptly, Soojin’s lines ends the song, which give a definite finish. The only improvement would be on “baa baa baa”(?), which should’ve been replaced with lyrics related to roar.

Meanwhile, I am impressed with Shuhua gaining more lines. It can be remembered that this was our issue raised on Senorita and Uh-Oh.

The author earlier emphasized how Cube is consistent on schedules. Cube releases first CLC’s comeback, followed by that of (G)I-DLE one month after. Though expected comeback is October (as CLC released Devil on September), it pushed a month further. It’s understandable since they are joining Queendom at that time.

Review by others

TheBiasList noted that the group got its “bluesy” appeal. Music takes a proper build-up of percussions which opens the chorus. Not to mention the lack of traps that plague most of K-Pop discography. The only concern would be on longevity of the track.

TweetNewscaster’s Overall Rating: 92.00%
Grade: A+
Assessment: Very Good

Scoreboard

Aspect   Criterion Points
Storyline 1 Storyline 5
Storyline 2 Consistent theme 5
Appearance 3 Colorful/color fits emotions 5
Appearance 4 Good taste 5
Appearance 5 No Halloween, Easter, etc. 5
Appearance 6 No astrology featured 5
Appearance 7 Less horror featured 5
Appearance 8 Not too revealing outfits 5
Music 9 Exciting/Expresses emotions 4
Music 10 Not too deafening 5
Dance 11 Learned easily even by beginners 5
Dance 12 Not too sensual 5
Lessons 13 Moral lesson clearly stated 4
Lessons 14 Impart something beneficial for viewers 5
Other Matters 15 Sense of humor/expresses emotions 7
Other Matters 16 Make it to mainstream media 3
Other Matters 17 Review by other sites 4
Other Matters 18 Review of MV as a whole 5
Other Matters 19 Sexiness is present 5

Monsta X – Someone’s Someone, Find You, Follow: MV Reviews

For our another set of reviews, we will touch on Monsta X with their release of three lead tracks.

Some reviewers only touch on Follow, as it is their proper comeback for this month. But the author included the other two since the group released these during October. For clarity and brevity, we refer to Someone’s Someone, Find You, and Follow as first, second, and third respectively.

As they are on international promotions, they gone mainstream. In fact, their song got its way to Vevo, the English counterpart of 1theK. As this is catered to wider audience, we will review them. As to Find You, we will review it too since this underrated track has proper MV.

(Side Note: Wonho being out of Monsta X adds to list of saddest events in K-Pop this year. Since this has direct effect over the group, Monbebes, and K-Pop as whole, we will rate Starship at year-end.)

Storyline

Someone’s Someone starts with the boys in the seaside, relaxing. They then traveled in search for someone.

The second music starts with the guys playing a game and singing till the night. Upon going home, they spotted a car, where the driver and his wife invited them to join in the ride. An accident happens, where the couple died. Only the members survived.

Upon realizing that the couple were dead, a member who undergone surgery did not accept this fact. He thought it over till it pushed him to commit suicide.

Finally, the members in Follow are situated in a time grotto, then looks upward as the eclipse approaches. During the dark, they enliven the desire of following the light. This came to reality when the eclipse ended, giving light again to the members.

They made a good deal featuring Kihyun standing at 1:48 (and same with the group at 3:02), serving as the longhand of sundial. This tells people what clocks were used before grandfather clocks and quartz ones were invented.

Review as whole

While the first song is short, I felt the mainstream element in the song. Liked the calm and light-hearted approach on Someone’s Someone. This shows that they can manage to do some works normally done by British/American artists.

The thumping upbeats, added with the howling and echoing sound, sustains the song throughout. Felt amazed too on how beats and silence (aided with snaps) are placed properly in the verses leading to chorus. The howling and echoing sound resumes at the end, giving a definite closing for the song.

Someone’s Someone tells that we all want to be with someone completing us. Them being in rain highlights sadness, the need to be with one they loved, and being alone. The bar is also being featured, with similar meanings as with the rain. Finally, the group featuring birds reflects the lesson of finding a partner who will help.

Find You itself tells of a boy who longed to find the couple who cared for him and his friends. As explained by various netizens, the music shares tunes with ones commonly heard in K-Dramas. Regardless of reference, this may be deemed as one whole movie or drama, instead of a proper comeback.

The scene of third song at 2:11 – 2:28 casts a shadow on what happened in Garden of Eden. There they are highlighting the value of following orders.

Somehow, the thumbnail at the video made me think of something. A member with halo is being considered a saint, where his/her good deeds are to be followed.

A bit of Indian tune can be sensed in a bit at the start of the video before they sing. It is also integrated in the choruses, mixed with usual upbeats. The exciting side only recedes with Joohoney suspending the momentum then resumes with his raps.

Review by others

KPopReviewed explains that the third song follows ONEUS in fusing traditional and modern music, which somehow is inviting. Added to the appealing energy was the raps of I.M and Joohoney, integrated as strong element in the performance.

TheBiasList was surprised over the “jam-packed” and energetic instrumentals of the third song, setting apart from cluttering EDM tracks. They made some parts of the song as if it engages people to listen, especially on raps which do not distract the song. However, the weak spot is on its repetitive chorus. This song is solid enough to stand out among other tracks.

TweetNewscaster’s Overall Rating (Separate):

Someone’s Someone: 93.75%
Find You: 90.00%
Follow: 89.52%
Grade: A+/A-/B+
Assessment: Excellent/Very Good/Good

TweetNewscaster’s Overall Rating (Consolidated): 90.91%
Grade: A-
Assessment: Very Good

Scoreboard

Aspect   Criterion Someone’s Someone Find You Follow
Storyline 1 Storyline 4 5 5
Storyline 2 Consistent theme 5 5 5
Appearance 3 Colorful/color fits emotions 5 5 5
Appearance 4 Good taste 5 5 5
Appearance 5 No Halloween, Easter, etc. 5 5 5
Appearance 6 No astrology featured 5 5 5
Appearance 7 Less horror featured 5 5 5
Appearance 8 Not too revealing outfits 5 5 5
Music 9 Exciting/Expresses emotions 5 4 4
Music 10 Not too deafening 5 5 5
Dance 11 Learned easily even by beginners     3
Dance 12 Not too sensual     5
Lessons 13 Moral lesson clearly stated 5 5 4
Lessons 14 Impart something beneficial for viewers 4 3 4
Other Matters 15 Sense of humor/expresses emotions 8 8 8
Other Matters 16 Make it to mainstream media 4 1 2
Other Matters 17 Review by other sites     4
Other Matters 18 Review of MV as a whole 5 5 5
Other Matters 19 Uploads video to 1theK   10 10
    Features 1theK logo (Bonus)      
    Prioritizes 1theK vid (Bonus)      

N.Flying (엔플라잉) – Good Bam (굿밤): MV Review

For the first time, we will feature N.Flying with their newest song Good Bam.

I just only knew the band when they released the song Leave It. This was my most favorite song of them, as it was very energetic. With their newest release Good Bam, I listened to their album teasers. I find the title quite funny, which we will discuss later.

It’s worth noting that FNC is listening on remarks of TheBiasList, by being generous with comebacks. The question is this: Would N.Flying attain the same status it had during the Rooftop era? Let’s see:

Storyline

Good Bam starts with the group waking up. They received a call, supposedly a date or event. While waiting at a restaurant, they do selfies, and sing at a karaoke bar. They take group pictures, play baseball, and shoot for toys. Tired of entertaining, they went home and rest to watch TV. The video ends with boys going outside again.

The lead track mainly teaches the lesson of enjoying life together with friends. This is the best way they illustrate the good life. It features various arcade games, which provide viewers alternative recreation. Added to that is on reviving the karaoke (Korean: 노래방), which sadly is declining in Korea.

At 1:07, Pink Panther toy is featured. I do hope this stirs consciousness for viewers to watch it.

On funny scenes, I find their difficulty of waking very funny, up to the time they wear dresses.

Review as whole

I did not find Good Bam as very exciting as Leave It, but I enjoyed it more than the hit song Rooftop and Spring Memories.

N.Flying is veering away from usual rock tracks they engaged in, trying to pull out a comfortable, easy-going song. The music can be categorized as soft rock.

I find it as toned-down when it comes to vocals unlike their previous tracks. That’s okay, and I appreciate that. Much better if they return next time to energetic beats like what they did in Leave It. That’s what I want in this group.

Review by others

KPopReviewed expressed that Good Bam is merely a follow-up song to describe their other side. Positives include the upbeat vocals and rapping that complements each other. It’s also exciting that the guitarist sang for the first time. All in all, this is an average song, but this is great.

TheBiasList told that N.Flying gained control of music since Rooftop era. While this song is fun, it acts merely as their follow-up song with their “straightforward” structure. It strikes balance between “breezy” melody and lazy songs and verses. While hip-hop influences can be heard, it could’ve been more exciting had they gone a bit “adventurous.”

Joketime

The title reminds me of Momoland’s song:

(Good) Bam! (Good) Bam!

Or that of GFRIEND:

Hey, sunny summer!
I’ll be a Good Bam…

Or that of Mamamoo’s Starry Night:

Now, did she haggle? My bitter.
Girl living a Good Bam
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Girl living a Good Bam…

TweetNewscaster’s Overall Rating: 87.37%
Grade: B-
Assessment: Satisfactory

Scoreboard

Aspect   Criterion Points
Storyline 1 Storyline 5
Storyline 2 Consistent theme 4
Appearance 3 Colorful/color fits emotions 4
Appearance 4 Good taste 5
Appearance 5 No Halloween, Easter, etc. 5
Appearance 6 No astrology featured 5
Appearance 7 Less horror featured 5
Appearance 8 Not too revealing outfits 5
Music 9 Exciting/Expresses emotions 4
Music 10 Not too deafening 5
Dance 11 Learned easily even by beginners  
Dance 12 Not too sensual  
Lessons 13 Moral lesson clearly stated 4
Lessons 14 Impart something beneficial for viewers 5
Other Matters 15 Sense of humor/expresses emotions 7
Other Matters 16 Make it to mainstream media 1
Other Matters 17 Review by other sites 4
Other Matters 18 Review of MV as a whole 5
Other Matters 19 Uploads video to 1theK 10
    Features 1theK logo  
    Prominently features 1theK vid (Bonus points)  

Love Advice No. 112

Narito naman tayo sa isa pang serye ng Love Advice sa site na ito. Sa totoo lang, ang susunod na love problem ay na-encode ko pa last April 2017, more than two years din.

Long overdue na, at mukhang hindi na ito applicable sa kanilang dalawa. Napakahaba ng love problem, pati ng advice. Kung naiinip ka, puwede ka nang dumiretso sa aking love advice. Sige, simulan na natin!


From University Secret Files:

“Kabit”

SPG

Bakit kapag ang lalaki may kabit natural na lang? Bakit kapag babae ang may kabit, parang sobrang baboy mo na? Sobrang laking issue? Sobrang hindi na makatarungan? Why?

Meron kasi akong loyal na boyfriend. As in loyal, may disiplina, guwapo, may diploma, may maganda nang trabaho, galante, nagiisip ng future kasama ako, at alam kong mahal ako. First love ko, first kiss, first sex. First niya din ako kaya that makes it extra special. Sabi nga ng mga tropa ko, suwerteng-suwerte na ako. Husband material na ang nabingwit ko.

Pero hindi lahat ng relasyon na akala niyo masaya, eh masaya talaga. Sobrang opposite kami ng boyfriend ko, as in lahat. Tahimik lang kasi siya at sobrang seryoso, well-organized at masinop sa pera. Walang bisyo at very brilliant pero mahina sa joke. Artistic sana pero masyadong sukat pa din ang gawa. Kumakanta siya pero hindi masyadong mahilig sa musika. Sayang daw sa oras, ika niya. Kailangan daw niyang magtrabaho. Hindi naman siya yayaman [sa musika].

Ako naman, on the other hand, ako ang type ng babae na makulit, madaldal, at baliw. Kumbaga sa classroom, ako ang laging nangungulit, tropa ng lahat, yung sa mga dulo umuupo, ganorn, at ganorn ako. Talented din daw ako. DAW. Ewan, nagbabanda ako dati. At saka, artistic talaga ako. Ako din ang tipo na maloko pero laging mataas ang grades. Ibang-iba sa boyfriend ko. Pero dahil mysterious ang boyfriend ko, doon ako na-inlove sa kanya. Iba kasi sa akin kaya nae-excite ako sa buhay niya kahit hindi [siya mismo] exciting. Humanga ako sa pagiging responsable niya. Sobra. Wala akong mapintas sa boyfriend ko. Sa sarili ko lang meron.

Nakilala ko si other guy nung sumapit ang 4th year namin ng boyfriend ko. Pinakilala siya ng tropa ko sa akin. Una pa lang, amoy ko nang fuckboy. Didiskarte pa lang siya, pero tinabla ko na. Pero ayaw paawat si gago, sanay na sanay lumandi. So kinulit ako. Ayoko talaga sa kaniya. At never talaga akong nagcheat sa boyfriend ko. Gwapo si other guy pero hindi ko talaga siya trip kasi mukhang babaero. Pero sabi nga nila, you can’t resist a playboy.

One time, nagkalabuan kami ng boyfriend ko. Nabadtrip ako sa kaniya. Lagi niya kasing kausap ang bestfriend niya. As in lagi. Minsan pinupuntahan niya pa yun agad kapag tinawag siya at umiiyak so automatic na cancelled ang date namin kapag nag-inarte si bisprin nya! (Ta@#$*!) Hindi naman ako selosa. Alam ko lang talaga na may gusto sa kanya bestfriend nya, KINGINA. Babae ako, alam ko ginagawa ng kapwa ko babae. So, dahil malabo kami ni boyfriend, pinagtyagaan ko na si other guy. Then that’s the start of it.

When I started knowing the other guy, dun ko napansin na madami kaming nakakaWTF na similarities. Una, yung nunal sa leeg at nunal sa kilay. Both on the very same spot. First time kong nakakilala na parehas ko ng nunal. Weird lang. Tapos pati mannerisms, mga ilang beses kaming nagkasabay nagpisil ng ilong and naghimas ng tyan Haha parehas din kami may birth mark sa binti. Hndi naman parehas pero halos parehas yung spot. NakakaWTF lang. Then, habang nagfofoodtrip kami sa bahay ng tropa nya, nag patugtog sya ng indie bands at put*ng*n* kami lang dalawa nakakaaalam ng kanta. Nagulat sya dahil sumabay ako sa kanta at kami lang nagsing along. Drummer din sya dati ng banda. Kaya nagclick kami parehas pa kami genre. At gumawa pa kami cover ng kanta, na nicompose nya. Pinasa namin yun sa himig handog pero hndi umubra e hahaha. At ako ang nagdesign ng pinatattoo nya sa binti. Marunong din pala si g*g* sa mga arts kaya mas lalo kaming swak. Sobrang parehas kami. Parehas talaga. Witty din sya. Parehas kami magjoke. Parehas kami trip. Parehas kami ng takbo ng bituka. Nung una talaga naging maayos kming tropa. Tropa talaga as in, murahan, g*g*han, bigla bigla magchachat skn para sabhing ang panget ko. Pag nakatambay kami sa dorm ng tropa ko, dadalhan ako ng ipis ng p&$/(&@!! Aasarin ako ng walang sawa. Huhusgahan lahat ng suot ko. Pipintasan yung ilong ko. Itatago yung mga gamit ko tapos ilalabas nalang kapag umiiyak nako. (T#$^#/^a, tinago nya iphone ko. Iyak talaga ko eh kala ko nanakaw ampota haha) makulit talaga. As in kaugali ko. Walwal talaga sya sobra pero may maayos na work. Graduate na din.

Eventually, nafafall talaga ko kay other guy, alam ko maling mali. Alam ko gago sya kasi pinormahan nya ko kahit may boyfriend nako. Alam ko niloloko ko na boyfriend ko. Alam ko sinungaling nako kasi minsan ssbhin ko mag OT ako, pero manunuod lang talaga kami ni other guy ng gig o kaya ppunta kami exhibit.

Lahat ng bagay kasundo ko si other guy. Ewan ko. Alam ko mali pero ngayon lang ako naging masaya. Yung totoong masaya. Nalabas ko yung side ko na matagal kong tinitimpi sa buhay ko dahil ayaw ng boyfriend ko pag madaldal ako at nakakahiya ginagawa ko sa public (e.g., nangungulangot) At nalaman ko pa sa tropa ko, nagka long term relationship naman daw yun. 5years. Kaso nga nagbreak na lang daw hindi nila alam dahilan tapos nagsimula ng magwalwal. As in nakikipag fubu daw si other guy. As in one week lang. Matagal na yung 1month. Nagulat nga daw sila nung una kasi loyal daw talaga yun sa ex nya. Pero eventually nasanay na silang fuckboy na talaga ang tropa nila. Aaminin kong nagulat ako sa kanya. Para sa kagaya kong isa lang ang nakasex ko. Boyfriend ko lang talaga. Kaya ako nagulat kasi he never initiated sex pagdting sa akin. Oo lagi kami magkasama pero tangina, nagmumurahan kami, nagjojoke kami about dicks and pussy. Pero he didn’t tell something about sex. He didn’t even kiss me. Hindi nya ko minanyak. For someone na sobrang fuckboy, hindi nya ko minanyak. Hello girls!!! Alama nyo naman pag nagpapahiwatig ng sex ang guy diba!? But hell no he didn’t.

Tumagal yung secret hangouts namin ni other guy, mga around 1year. Pero may mga times na bigla bigla syang maglalaho then lilitaw ulit. Fuckboy nga kasi diba? Di na nakakagulat. Pero pagnagkita kami..i can’t contain my happiness. Si boyfriend? Ayun. Laging kasama bestfriend nya. Napapaisip na nga ko kung meant to be ba talaga kami eh. Naiinggit ako sa bestfriend nya, nagkakasundo silang dalawa sa work dahil parehas sila ng linya. Parehas silang mahilig sa anime at na-oop talaga ko sa uspaan nilang mga putangina sila. Hindi nila kilala yung mga bands na gusto ko. Tangina. Feeling ko hindi ko kilala yung sarili kong boyfriend. Naaawa ako sa sarili ko.

Then until one day, pumunta ko sa apartment ni boyfriend. Papakita ko sana sakanya yung art work ko na ipapasa ko sa isang client. Pero nasurprise ako at andun yung bestfriend nya. Kumakain sila together. Wtf diba? Ako? Wala lang nag beso pa kami ng malandi. Umalis ako don then punta kay other guy. Baka kasi masubsob ko bestfriend nya sa sushi nila!!! Tangina. Parehas sila ng favorite na sushi!!! Ayoko non! Malansa!! Malansa kagaya nya.

Kinwento ko kay other guy, at di ko na din napigilan umiyak. Dun na din umamin si other guy na talagang seryoso na sya skn. Bakit ba daw hindi na lang kasi sya? Ngayon lang sya nakahanap ng taong sobrang katulad nya. As in. Tigang na nga daw sya eh. Dahil mula nung nakilala nya ko at naghahangout na kami, di na sya nakikipag sex sa mga kalandian nya na only one call away. Hahaha kadiri amputa. Haha tsaka umiyak sya skn. As in he confessed that he’s already in love with me. Ngayon na lang daw sya nainlove and alam nyang mali dahil may boyfriend ako pero mahal na nya talaga ko and he’s so sure about it daw dahil alam nya yung babaeng panglandi lang at hindi daw ako pang ganon pero mali lang talaga. Tangina. Ako? Ayun walang masagot. Naguguluhan din kasi ako. Tama bang ipagkatiwala ko ang puso ko sa ganon klaseng lalaki? May assurance ba? Iiwan ko ba yung long term boyfriend ko para mag take ng risk sa lalaking to? Pero very wrong, dun may nangyari samin. First sex sa ibang lalaki. Wtf. Di ko din alam pero yung gabing yon..ibang iba eh. Iba talaga nararamdaman ko kay other guy. Mahal ko na ata. Oo. Mahal na nga ata yung right word. He made me the happiest that night. A night that I will always look back to. Alam kong maling mali yun pero I can’t resist. I’ve drown myself into his.

Pero alam nyo yung ending? Kay boyfriend pa din ako. Kasi natatakot akong mag take ng risk. Natatakot akong baka bigla na lang akong iwan ni other guy at bumalik sya sa dati nyang gawi. Natatakot ako. Kaya after may mangyari smin, sinabi ko sakanya kalimutan nya na lang. Tangina. Ang playgirl ko sa part na yon. Feeling ko ang badass ko. One night stand naba tawag don? Tangina. Kaya eto, patuloy pa din ako sa boyfriend ko.

Sabi nila perfect relationship? Kasi matagal? Sige. I’ll post as many pics as you want para lagi kayong kiligin sa love story namin ng boyfriend ko. Kasi alam ko kapag nagpost ako ng pic namin ni other guy…everyone would judge me. Everyone will tell me na ang tanga tanga ko para iwan yung long term ko at palitan ng fuckboy. Sa panahon kasi ngayon, people believe in to what their eyes tell them.

Saklap. I was born in a very mad world.

Saklap. I was born to be so coward. Saklap. I was born in a judgmental era.

To the other guy, kung nababasa mo to alam ko malalaman mong ikaw tinutukoy ko. sorry hindi ako nagtake ng risk. Sorry hindi kita napaglaban. Sorry nakilala kita sa maling panahon. Sorry sinayang ko yung pagkakataon. Sorry tanga ko eh. Sorry at kinulong ko na naman ang sarili ko sa relasyon na hindi na ko masaya.

Sorry that I have to keep you as a secret. Sorry. But that was one hell of a journey. You’ll always be the best thing that I never had. You made me the happiest. Thank you. Hindi man kita napagmalaki sa ibang tao, hinding hindi naman kita makakalimutan. Pinaramdam mo sa akin na merong isang taong kagaya mong sobrang kaparehas ko.

If only we’d live in a different time; in a different place. Baka naging tayo. Baka sa past lives natin naging tayo na, or baka sa susunod na life natin maging tayo na. Sorry that I let you down. Tandaan mo, hindi mo ko karma don’t consider me as your karma. Dahil minahal kita hindi nga lang kita naipaglaban.

If magkita ulit tayo sana may babae ng magmamalaki sayo. Yung hindi ka itatago. Yung hindi ka gagawing kabit. Sorry.

You are the saddest playlist I’ve ever played.

-Babaeng Hindi Blooming

CEU-2015 

My Advice:

Wala namang masama kung piliin mo ang the other guy. Pero wag mo namang lokohin ang boyfriend mo.

Puwede mo din itong ikonsidera:

You: Alam mo, hon, feeling ko, kailangan nating maghiwalay.

Boyfriend: Ha? Bakit naman?

You: Alam mo kasi, napapansin ko na nagiging close kayo ng bestfriend mo. Bakit ba tuwing may kailangan siya, sugod ka agad na parang spaceship? Ano ba ang meron sa kanya, ha?

Aaminin ko na nung time na nakita ko kayo sa apartment mo, naiinis ako. Sana ako na lang ang nasa posisyon niya.

Hindi naman kita pinipigilan, pero dapat mo ring isaisip na ako pa rin ang girlfriend mo. Alam mo ba na mayroong nagkagusto sa akin, pero ayaw ko pa rin? Kasi iniisip kita. Mahal pa rin kita. Pero kung uunahin mo pa rin iyang bestfriend mo, wala na akong magagawa. Mas mabuti nang maghiwalay na tayo.

Isa pa, dapat mong pagsabihan iyang bestfriend mo. Dapat siyang matuto na maging independent. Maghanap na siya ng ibang masasandalan niya. Kayang-kaya naman niya, siya pa kaya?

[Bahala na kayong mag-usap, pero pag-usapan na ninyo kung ano ang problema niya sa iyo, at ang problema mo sa kanya.]

Sa pagkakataong ito, parang “magbabanta” ka na hihiwalayan mo siya. (Pero wag mong gagawin iyan kung ayaw niya.) Dito mo makikita kung ano ang naging ugat ng problema ninyong dalawa. Mas lalo mo ding makikita kung talagang mahal ka niya o mahal na niya ang bestfriend niya.

O puwede mo na siyang diretsahin kung gusto mo talaga ang future boyfriend mo. May basehan ka rin naman kung bakit kayo nagkakalabuan, dahil siya ang may kasalanan. Puwede mo na rin siyang hiwalayan. Mas makakabuti ito sa iyo para malaya kang magmahal.

(Side Note: Curious lang ako. Since may similarities kayo, mula sa nunal hanggang sa mannerisms, baka nga magkapatid kayo?)

Your problem?

Samantala, maaring sa parte mo ay nagkulang ka sa relationship ninyo. Tanungin kita:

  • Ipinaliwanag mo ba sa boyfriend mo na mali ang ginagawa niya? Kasi baka hindi niya namamalayan na nauubos ang oras niya sa bestfriend, sa halip na sa iyo. Maaring sumobra siya sa limitasyon nang hindi niya alam ang ginagawa niya. Pag nagmatigas pa rin, doon mo na siya hiwalayan.
  • Ginawa mo ba ang lahat para mas makilala ang boyfriend mo? Kasi kung tutuusin, mahigit apat na taon kayo, at marami pang time para mag-usap kayo. Pero sabi mo nga, “Feeling ko hindi ko kilala yung sarili kong boyfriend.”
  • Naiintindihan mo ba na kasama sa isang relasyon ang pagdaan sa maraming pagsubok, tulad ng pagpapansin ng bestfriend ng bf mo?
  • Nung dumating sa point na parang namemeligro ang relasyon mo sa existing bf, meron ka bang ginawa upang ipaglaban siya?
  • Kinompronta mo ba ang bestfriend niya? Kasi kung tutuusin, mas may karapatan ka kaysa sa bestie niya.
  • Nag-effort ka ba para ituon ang pansin niya sa iyo? Hindi talaga uubra sa akin ang alibi na “iniwan” mo siya dahil “iniwan” ka niya, lalo pa’t meron pa namang paraan para akitin si boy.

Kung susundin ko ang katuwiran mo, dapat mag-effort ka rin. Dapat ka nang dumiskarte. Hindi lang si guy ang lagi nang manunuyo at mag-eeffort sa iyo. Isa pa, sa panahon ngayon ay lalong tumitindi ang tukso sa paligid.

  • Tama ba ang reaksyon mo nang nagkakalabuan kayo? Kung ganyan ang diskarte mo sa pag-solve ng problema, hindi malabong maghiwalay din kayo ni the other guy, lalo pa’t kung may higit pa sa kanya.
  • Wala na ba talagang paraan para magkaroon kayo ng similarities? Kasi, kung ito ang major problem ninyong dalawa, aba’y gawan mo ng paraan. Maghanap kayo ng similarities ninyong dalawa, na mapapansin mo habang unti-unti mo siyang nakikilala. Baka mahilig kayong pareho sa ganyang pagkain o pelikula.

If you choose…

Isa pang tanong: Paano kung iniwan ko siya para sa the other guy? Ngayon, paano kung dumating ang panahong naging kayo na, tapos eh dumaan din ang ganyang pagsubok? Lilipat ka na naman sa iba? Wala namang ganern, bes.

Kung sa ngayon ay medyo okay pa kayo ng future boyfriend mo, darating ang panahon na lilitaw at lilitaw ang iba pang mga problema na hahamon sa inyong dalawa.

Take a risk

Sa kabilang banda, may pagkakamali din naman ang boyfriend mo. Di niya narerealize na kailangan mo siya. At wala din siyang ginagawang paraan para ipakilala ang sarili niya sa iyo.

Malinaw na personal choice mo kung gusto mong maging kayo ni other guy. Pero maiintindihan ko kung kay present boyfriend ka pa rin, dahil iyon ang tama since kayo pa nga that time.

Kung hiniwalayan mo na ang boyfriend mo, ngayon na ang panahon para maging masaya ka. Dahil kung sakaling pinili mo si the other guy, hindi na siya magiging “kabit”.

Isa pa, kung mahal mo naman si the other guy, bakit ka matatakot na sumugal? Dahil ba sa sasabihin ng ibang tao? Prove them wrong. Ito na ang pagkakataon mo para patunayan na ikaw lang ang magpapabago sa buhay niya.

Bakit? Nakikita ko na maingat din siya sa iyo, at nirerespeto ka din niya. Hindi ka niya itinuring na parang balewala, tulad ng ibang babae na nakasama niya. At mukhang malabo na bumalik siya sa dating gawi – kung tutulungan mo siyang magbago.

Base sa kuwento, naging fuckboy lang siya after ng breakup nila. Naiintindihan ko naman ang pinagdaraanan niya. Dahil may mga sitwasyon na kayang baguhin ang ating pagkatao, at ang masakit pa, dito siya naligaw ng landas.

So, take the risk. Kasi mas malaki ang tsansa na maging kayo. Mahal mo siya, at ibinabalik naman niya ito sa iyo. At kung may masabi ang ibang tao sa inyo, eh anong magagawa nila? Lalo na’t may trabaho din pala siya. May direksyon na siya pagdating sa trabaho at career niya. Ang kailangan lamang ay direksyon pagdating sa pag-ibig, at kailangan ka niya dito.

(Isa pang risk na dapat din ninyong i-focus ay ang pagkakaiba ninyong dalawa. Baka kasi dito ang magiging reason ng hiwalayan niyo, if ever. Kahit may similarities kayo, lilitaw din ang differences niyong dalawa.)


Additional Note: Gender issues

Ngayon, sa tanong mo, “Bakit kapag ang lalaki may kabit, natural na lang? Bakit kapag babae ang may kabit, parang sobrang baboy mo na?”

Hindi pa rin kasi uso noon ang “gender equality” gaya ng nakikita natin ngayon. At dahil sa panahon lang natin ito nangyari, di basta maiaalis ang pananaw na “kapag ang lalaki pag may kabit, natural na lang.” Kapag may kabit ang babae, parang “sobrang baboy” daw, dahil hindi tayo sanay sa ganitong sitwasyon.

Actually, wala namang masyadong problema kung pagsasabayin mo sila. Haha. Pero seryoso, meron akong nakausap na babae na hinayaan na maging Syota No. 1, No. 2, o No. 3. (Hindi ko na matandaan kung sino siya.) Kung sa iba na katulad niya ay okay lang, walang problema. Hindi pa naman kasi kasal ang magsyota. Kaya lang, mahirap ito dahil hahatiin ng bf niya ang oras at pagmamahal.

Pero may problema kung gusto mo nang magpakasal, which in this case kailangan mo talagang pumili ng isa.

Sa isang banda, mapa-babae o mapa-lalaki man, mali din naman na magkaroon ng kabit. Wala itong pinipiling kasarian. Yun nga lang, dahil nakasanayan na lalaki ang may kabit, nagiging normal na ito. Pero muli, mali din iyan.